How to Not Get Nervous Around Girls So you’re talking to a girl
You’re probably standing there feeling like a ducking bad*** James Bond *******, right? Wrong!
Some tips for those of you feeling nervous around girls.
You’re probably nervous as ****, your heart is starting to beat faster, you realize your heart is starting to beat faster so you start thinking “oh ****,” then you start talking and you realize you’re blushing and you start thinking “god dangit! stop being nervous!
And at that point, you start acting really awkward, and the girl looks like she’s ready to get out of there
Sound familiar? So today I’m gonna teach you a TON of ways to not get nervous around girls EVER AGAIN
#1 Be in your own element
If you’re going on a date, and you go over to HER house, and then you go to HER favorite restaurant, and HER friends are there and listen to music SHE likes, that is NOT what you want to do
Bring her into YOUR world
Go to a place where you’re already really comfortable Wear an outfit that you wear all the time and that you love.
Listen to music that you like.
If other people are gonna be there, they should be YOUR friends, not hers Things like that
If you’re in an atmosphere that you’re already used to, and that you already like, you’re gonna be a lot more comfortable
#2 Before you talk to a girl, decide you’re not gonna pursue her NO MATTER WHAT
If you’re out somewhere and you see a girl you want to talk to, but you’re nervous, just decide ahead of time that no matter how well the interaction goes, you’re never gonna see her again.
Even if she’s really into you, you’re not gonna ask for her number and you’re not gonna invite her out.
It’s already decided Then go talk to her.
Now there’s no pressure, because whether she’s impressed by you or not is irrelevant, since you’ve already decided she’s just a practice run and you’ll never see her again anyway.
Now, obviously you don’t do this with every girl, but it’s a good technique if you’re just starting out, or trying to get warmed up before going for the girls you really care about.
#3 Concentrate on a specific image
This is an interesting technique that you can use with girls or in any situation that makes you uncomfortable.
Visualize a very specific image, for example, a piece of your favorite fruit What does it look like?
What shades of color are in it? What is its texture?
How does the light hit it? What shadows are on it?
What does it smell like? Pick a thing, and focus your mind on it.
The human brain finds it very difficult to focus on multiple things at the same time, so if you’re really focusing on one specific thing, it’s gonna be really hard for you to also focus on the fact that you’re inexperienced and nervous.
#4 Comedy Laughing is proven to lighten you up and make you less nervous
It can be anything from watching a funny TV show before a date, to reading some funny stuff on reddit from your phone right before you approach a girl (note: I recommend “old people facebook,” I’ll have a link to it in the description).
#5Visualization Visualize ahead of time exactly what you plan to do Not how you want the girl to react, but what YOU will do.
What you’ll look like, how you’ll walk up to her, how you’ll be standing or sitting, what your smile will look like, what you’ll say
Also, this is very important: visualize the EMOTION you’ll feel as well, like happiness, or excitement, or intrigue, or whatever it is you WANT to feel.
#6 Don’t fight your nerves
If you’re already with her and you start feeling nervous, don’t fight it.
Thinking “oh —- I’m getting nervous,” and trying to fight it, actually just makes you even more nervous.
If you don’t believe me, notice it next time, as soon as you start thinking “—-, my heart is beating fast, stop beating fast, cut it out heart!” all it does it make you EVEN MORE nervous.
So don’t do that If you start feeling nervous sensations in your body, just feel them.
See what it feels like What part of the body do you feel them in?
Then just let it pass Alternatively, when you visualize, you can also include that nervousness in your visualization.
Visualize your heart beating faster, for example, and then you’re more prepared for it, so when it happens it just happens and then it passes, and you don’t go through the process of thinking “oh! here we go!” because you already expect it and it isn’t a surprise.
#7 Have a positive lifestyle
If you already have a really positive lifestyle and you’re happy with your life, you’re not gonna be as nervous when you talk to girls, because no matter what happens with the girl, you still have a bad— life to go back to anyway
If James Bond hits on a girl and she shoots him down, he doesn’t give a —-, he still has a really fun job and he still drives an Aston Martin.
So he doesn’t care.
But, if your life sucks, and you’ve placed all your energy on getting a girl and you think your entire happiness is dependent on whether you get a girl or not, then of course you’re gonna be really nervous.
Build up your own life, your health, hobbies, goals, relationships with family, things like that.
#8 Use it as a learning experience
If you’re out with a girl, don’t be there thinking about — the entire time “How do I impress this girl? How do I get her to like me?
How do I get her to have — with me?” because let’s be honest, that’s usually what you do, isn’t it?
Don’t be ashamed, it’s what a lot of guys do, even I’ve done it.
But that’s not the best thing to do.
What I like to do now, is see what I can learn from the experience.
Does she have anything interesting to say, that I can learn from?
Are there any specific activities I’ve been wanting to try, that I invite her to join me for?
If you’re inexperienced in dating, see how you can improve your own skills through the experience, for example by paying more attention to the girl’s body language and trying to identify what she’s thinking, not as a way to have — with her, but as a way for you to improve your skills of perception.
#9 Go out with more interesting girls
If you’re going out with generic girls and bimbos then it can actually be a little harder because you always have to control the conversation and play off what they say in order to keep it interesting.
On the other hand, if you go out with a more interesting girl, she’s gonna be bringing up cool topics to talk about, and asking you questions that you guys can have fun discussing, and things like that.
Then instead of seeing her as just an interchangeable hole to put your —- in, you’ll see her as more of an actual person and you’ll just be there having fun
#10 Act as if you are who you want to be
You probably have goals and dreams, and you probably haven’t achieved all of them yet But imagine you have.
Maybe your goal is to live in a beach house in the Bahamas after selling your company for 30 million dollars.
Or to have a fun job as a racecar driver and a family that you have a great relationship with.
Perhaps your goal is to learn how to fly around in the air like a Greek god
When you’re out somewhere, imagine that you’re already that guy Imagine how you’d act if you were already there Then act like that
If you just learned how to fly, are you really gonna be nervous about talking to a girl? no!
YOU CAN FLY!
You don’t care AT ALL whether she likes you or not because at the end of the day, YOU CAN FLY!
Whatever your goal is, imagine that you’re already there, and then act how you would act.
Try it out So those are my 10 tips
You might have heard some of them, you might not have, they’re all things that.
I personally learned or invented myself over the years and that I’ve used with a lot of success.
Start trying em out right now, then come back and leave a comment and tell me which ones you liked the best!
OUTRO: Tired of those other dating advice channels that make long videos just to give you 1 or 2 really vague tips?
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